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Sigh.. Haven't blog for a while liaoz. Wanted to blog on Sunday night( which was one of the rare moments when I have free time ), but the stupid computer adamantly refuses to boot, now, all my previous days thoughts have been gone for good. =p

Was actually a bit pissed off by my bro, who played the comp till it overburned, which led to me not being able to boot the computer. Oh well, come to think of it, he was not to be blamed also, if I were him, stuck at studying in school the whole week, I will also seek solace with the computer at weekends. Blame it on.... dunno oso... Haha... seems like no one is at fault...

Hmm... dont know what has been happening to me these years, but even though I was bullied and treated unfairly by others, I seem unable to bring out the anger so characteristic of the young me-- the punching of classmates upon irritation, the throwing of chairs upon frusration, the typical shirt-tearing, bruise-inflicting, bloody struggles and conflicts. Is this growing up-- the mellowing of the rashness of youth? The replacement of the rebellious, non-conforming streak for a more sensible, realistic one? The overpowering of emotions by sheer cool-headed reasoning?

I can only mildly recall me being pissed off by juniors who took my school bag, when my poor mother is still waiting for me to da bao dinner home ;and the last time I ever lost total control of myself was the time when because of some bizzare unexplained reason, I started a slapping competition with my fren more than a year back.

Maybe the fire in me has died long ago. Or maybe it just lies dormant, waiting for something to trigger off a catastrophic chain reaction.

I dunno, but if it were the latter, I sincerely hope that the initiating spark never comes though.

For I like the present me more. =)