Distraughted

A terrible feeling gnawed at my heart, when the sudden realization that I will never hear his melodious voice again sunk in so abuptly at the back of my head.

"Eh, u Siqi from hwachong izzit? My fren tell me U very famous there leh, always peep at girls one"
"Huh, no la.. I Shuqi wat... Onli guys peep at me onli la... I not lesbian one leh....

Male bonding sets in the moment one finds his match in toking crap. It is not surprising dat he soon crept into a place in my heart, as we tok about crap, girls, army and so on. I was, in his eyes, a different JC student from wat he normally seen, and he was, in my eyes, a unique crapper, an interesting personnel.

Soon, we were posted to diff camps, and i nvr heard news from him, except thru some outings, work, and phonecalls, till today, when his camp mate passed me the distressing news.

I will never hear his crap again. I dunno y he left this world, and that doesnt matter to me now. He has gone, and has taken a part of me along with it; the times we spent together are now onli memories, never to be relived again.

I used to be unable to understand and fathom the grieve pple felt over deaths... even the passing away of my Hwachong senior brought nothing den a slight stir in my heart, and even that, the stir was caused by pity and shockness. But when the person is someone u are personally acquainted with, someone who not onli u knoe, but has a place in ur heart, the feeling is terrible... its like.. i almost has died together with the person.. the sadness is so overwhelming...

I badly needs to be comforted now... I.....I...